To find peace back to what used to be home

Synopsis

A lost love…

A&E Nurse Amy Spencer lives a very ordinary life in Port Kara. She loves her job at the hospital and has a great group of friends, but there is something or someone, missing from her life. Amy’s tried dating but no one ever compares with the one boy that got away – Lijah Byrne.

A surprise arrival…

Lijah’s life since he left Port Kara has been what dreams are made of. But lately Lijah has started to feel hollow – the fame and celebrity he once craved now makes him feel trapped. The only place he’s ever felt safe is Port Kara…so maybe it’s time to go back home?

A reunion written in the stars.

When Amy bumps into Lijah again, she only sees the boy she once loved with all her heart. But their lives are so different now. Amy knows a rekindling of their past love will end in heartbreak, but she can’t give up her second chance to be with the man she loves.

My review

Amy Spencer has had never the urge of leaving her home in Port Kara. And with being an A&E nurse, she couldn’t be happier. Or could she? Because seeing everyone finding that special someone to share their lives with, makes her realize that there is something missing in her life. And no matter how much she has tried dating in the past, no one could ever compare to her first love, Lijah Byrne.
Their relationship ended as Lijah wanted to pursue his dreams and make a career with his singing and Amy just couldn’t manage to go along with him, and holding him back.
Lijah has been indeed successful in the past years, but losing his mother made him feel lonelier than ever, and even feel trapped. With his best friend, Lijah decides to go back to the one place that ever felt safe to him, Port Kara.
When Amy bumps into Lijah, it feels like no time has passed at all. However, their lives are now so different, and they both have also changed. So if they would start over again, it can only end in heartbreak, right? Or is it worth the risk, opening their hearts for each other again?

Whether it’s a story about midwives, nurses or even more heavier subjects, I just have to read each book Jo Bartlett brings out. Because one way or another, whether lots of joy or heartbreak, her stories always touch me.

And I am used that Jo brings delightful characters in our lives, but I have to admit that Amy went a level higher. I cannot exactly pinpoint exactly why, but she just does. She is such a gentle character, and deserves to have all the happiness and love in her life.

Unfortunately, you and I both know that life doesn’t work that way… And Amy not only is struggling with a brother that is too outspoken, even for himself, but as she finds herself average, perhaps even below average, she thinks that she is never good enough. And that not only saddened me, but it mostly angered me. Because Amy *is* a wonderful woman, and I wanted to slap (yes, the angrier I got, the more aggressive I become 😊)  everyone that has or is still hurting Amy…

And her love life isn’t that great either… Yes, of course if you are still comparing everyone to that great first love, that perhaps you have even made greater than it was, it is difficult for anyone to be the perfect match. But in Amy’s case, she is clearly also finding only sleazebags as partners, men that pull her even more down instead of lifting her up… 

So obviously when Lijah returns back home, Amy thinks about how amazing they have been. But people grow up, they change, and Amy realizes that, and as her life and Lijah’s couldn’t be more different, she doesn’t truly believe in a second chance. And it was painful to read how her own securities were holding her back, not allowing to have a second chance at that amazing love.

But to put all the ‘blame’ on Amy wouldn’t be fair, as for sure also Lijah himself is facing several demons in this book…

He is a known persona, but while the world of fame and fortune is an alluring one, he also has seen the other side, the much darker world. A world filled with dishonesty, addictions and anxiety. And it broke my heart reading how at loss he is feeling after losing his mother.
Of course losing a parent is a devastating event. But getting to know Lijah’s background more, how  important the relationship with his mother has been, made me understand Lijah and his pain so much better.

What I liked about Lijah, is that even if he is famous, he is so down to earth. He never let fame get into his head, or made him act like a hotshot like some other famous people would. And once back in Port Kara, back home, the place that is painful for him, is also the place that can heal him. Once back in Port Kara, I could almost feel him able to breath again, even if there are still some hurdles he needs to take.

In Amy’s and Lijah’s story we see two people who are going through their own emotional difficulties. Their mind isn’t set of getting back together, yet somehow they keep on meeting again and again. And it was so sweet to see how they are initially rekindling their friendship, being there for each other. But they are also trying to make each other understand that who they are is more than enough.

But this isn’t just Amy’s and Lijah’s story. But finally Gwen get her own spotlight! And dare i say, about time too! Although, that also means that Gwen is not going to have an easy time…

Gwen is always a force of nature. She may be one of the kindest and most compassionate people in the world, so seeing her out of character truly had me worried. Gwen is not a woman that can sit still, do nothing. And this flat, subdued Gwen is not the Gwen we all have loved from her first appearance.

And I could understand her fear of going to the GP to discover what is wrong with her. Aren’t we all afraid of discovering that something is not well with us? But in Gwen’s case, her fear was even more understandable with what happened to her own mother. And I could comprehend how the fear of Gwen possible losing herself held her back.

In this book, it felt like fear was the main feeling. Fear of being yourself, fear of not knowing who you are, fear of others. But also fear of what the future may hold, and fear of letting love back in your life. But it’s also about not losing hope and understanding that you are enough, more than just enough. And that the doubts and fear and all the anxiety you have and feel are there to make you stronger, more confident. Giving a lost love a new chance may be the real medecine you need to grow and become the best version of yourself.

Jo Bartlett once again amazed me, even though I shouldn’t be surprised anymore, should i? I loved this book, that gives us all the insecurities and doubts we have all experienced ourselves, but we also see all the ray lof lights that life can give us. Can this amazing author even be more amazing than she already is???